Punjabi Sikh Wedding Traditions: Chunni to Anand Karaj Guide

Even before a Punjabi Sikh couple enters the Gurdwara, their families have already performed weeks of ceremonies that most guides bypass. All the write-ups that we've read on this topic have skipped from "engagement" to "Anand Karaj" as if nothing were done in between. In fact, the actual emotion is in the Kurmai, the Chunni, the Jaggo night, the Chooda and the Sangeet, and so is most of what's worth filming.

For years we have been filming and taking photos at Punjabi Sikh weddings in London and the UK. This guide takes couples and
guests through the customs leading up to Anand Karaj in the sequence they are likely to occur, so they can be aware of what each one entails.

The Kurmai and Chunni: How the Families Come Together

The Kurmai Ceremony

The official engagement is called the Kurmai. It is normally held in the
groom's house or in a gurdwara and is attended by close relatives from both houses. A Granthi can begin with a brief prayer and at the end the families can exchange gifts. The bride's family gives the groom a sweets and clothes, as well as the traditional Sikh steel bangle (kara). Rings are given to symbolize the commitment openly and the meal which follows is sometimes the first time both families sit together as a family.

The Chunni Ceremony

The Chunni ceremony is frequently held the same day or soon thereafter. The groom's family visits the bride and drapes a red chunni (long scarf) over her head to formally welcome her into the family. She's also given jewellery, makeup and sometimes the red outfit she'll wear on her wedding day.

A more subdued ceremony than the Kurmai; where mothers and grandmothers tend to become emotional. When there's a photographer or videographer there, it's best to stay away from the couple and go with the older women in the room, as that's typically where the best reactions are going to be.

The Night of Jaggo

The ceremony is as it says: “Jaggo” translates to “wake up” and the ceremony is a wake up. Held the night before the wedding, it's a loud procession through the neighbourhood. Everyone is dancing to the
dhol beats, and women from the family decorate the brass or copper pots on their head, and sometimes light them with small candles.

Jaggo also used to be an informal invitation. As there were no printed cards, people would walk around the streets and announce the wedding the next day. This is no longer common, but the noise and the dancing are still here. It's one of the most fun events in the whole week for anyone who has ever made a film: there is a lot of movement, warm candlelight in the dark, and the crowd doesn't perform for a camera.

The Chooda Ceremony

The Chooda is the time when the bride's maternal uncle gives her a pair of bangles, which are made of red and ivory, and are purified first in milk and rose petals. The bride is traditionally covered during bangles as it is believed that the bride must not see the bangles before they are put on her wrist. As each bangle is added, it is blessed by the Elder family members, and sometimes flower petals are sprinkled on her head after all the bangles have been added.

Others perform a brief turmeric ceremony before the Chooda, called Maiyan, in which a paste made of turmeric and sandalwood is applied to the bride and groom in their respective houses. This is the Sikh and Punjabi version of the Hindu's haldi and it has the same form. The Hindu wedding ceremony ritual is explained in full detail in our guide to Hindu wedding ceremonies.

The Sangeet: Music, Dance and Family Performances

The big musical night just before the wedding is known as Sangeet, which is typically performed one or two days prior to the Anand Karaj. An evening designed entirely for the family to enjoy together, and it's all about performance! Dance numbers are arranged weeks ahead by siblings and cousins, and aunties are always called upon to sing a folk song or two, while the bride and groom are invariably involved in one or
more of their own numbers, even if they don't know them.

The Sangeet was traditionally a music for women, rather like a bridal shower except with music, and was never meant to be a
party. In most cases today, both families are invited to a Sangeet, and it is the loudest and brightest room of the entire wedding week, making it easier to cover. If you're going to see a choreographed number, it might be best to get there early enough to see it before the room becomes a general dance floor since when that happens, the planned numbers get lost in the shuffle.

Here, guests can dress out with style. Lehengas, shararas and heavily
embellished anarkalis are all standard and colour is hardly ever held back.

The Anand Karaj

The Anand Karaj is the ceremony that all the above culminates in. It is performed at the Gurdwara, in front of the Guru Granth Sahib and is based around the four Laavan, hymns sung by the couple when they circle the Guru Granth Sahib together. We've put together a complete
breakdown of what happens during the ceremony, the etiquette expected inside the Gurdwara and how it's covered on the day in The Complete Guide to Photographing an Anand Karaj. If you are in charge of the
ceremony, or hiring a photographer or videographer for the ceremony, then read this page next.

The Vidaai

The Vidaai closes out the wedding on an emotional note. The bride tosses some rice over her shoulder as she departs for her new home, thanking the family which she is departing from. It is typically the most
emotional part of the day and frequently one of the most memorable for couples watching their movie. Unlike many of the ceremonies
of the day, the Vidaai is not written, and usually it happens in a slightly
different way at each wedding.

What to Wear: A Guest's Guide to Each Ceremony

Most guides to a Sikh wedding will give you the answer to "what should I wear to a Sikh wedding" as though there's only one attire for the whole week, but there are unspoken rules for each event.

• Kurmai and Chunni: Simple and festive colors are good here. A pastel or light toned Salwar Kameez or kurta set would suffice as these events are not held in the presence of a large crowd of people, but rather with close family.
• Jaggo and Sangeet: This is the time to get dressed! Both events include a significant amount of dancing and the bright colours, more embellishment and comfortable footwear are all important.
• Chooda: Appropriate for soaking up the experience with close family, so clothes remain similar to the Kurmai, comfortable and unfussy.
• The Anand Karaj: Modesty comes first. Inside the Gurdwara, heads must be covered, shoulders and legs remain covered and shoes are taken off at the door. Bright colors are welcome, but white and black should be avoided as both colors are traditionally considered to be mourning colors.
• The reception: The most liberal dress code for the week. Sarees, lehengas and formal suits are all popular and this is typically the time when guests wear their most elaborate attire for the entire wedding.
  

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the difference between Kurmai and Chunni ceremonies?

The formal engagement is the Kurmai, which is normally done at the groom's home, with families exchanging gifts and the couple exchanging rings. The Chunni ceremony is the formal reception of the bride by the groom's family, which is symbolized by the bride's head being covered with a red scarf. They are closely related to each other and sometimes occur on the same day.

What is the Jaggo ceremony?

Jaggo is a night before the wedding procession that involves women from the family dancing in a procession to the dhol beats and carrying decorated pots with lit candles through the neighbourhood. It used to be an informal invitation to the wedding.

What is the Chooda ceremony?

Chooda is the time when the bride's maternal uncle puts on a pair of red and ivory bangles on her wrist, which is cleansed first with milk and rose petals. Traditionally the bride will not view the bangles before they are placed on her.

Is the Sangeet only for women?

Yes, but most modern Sangeets are open to families and close friends. It is still one of the most music and dance filled events of the wedding week.

What is Maiyan and how is it different from Haldi?

Turmeric ceremony is known as Maiyan in Punjabi Sikh tradition, in which a paste made of turmeric and sandalwood is smeared on the bride and groom before the wedding. Similar to the Hindu Haldi ceremony, but with a different name and some regional variations.

What happens during the Anand Karaj?

The Sikh wedding ceremony is called Anand Karaj, which is performed at the Gurdwara where the Guru Granth Sahib is placed in front of them. It focuses on the four Laavan, songs which are chanted while the couple walk around the scripture together. For more of a breakdown, check
out our full Anand Karaj guide.

What should guests wear to a Sikh wedding?

Depends on the event. Pastel, simple ones are suitable for Kurmai and Chunni, bold and embellished ones are suitable for Jaggo and Sangeet and modest coverage is required at the Anand Karaj, white and black are best avoided all through.